Child Like Faith: A Strong Reminder and Refreshing Intention

Recently at church, our pastor talked about scripture directly from the bible that pointed toward being more like children and having child like faith to know God better. He took a deep dive into some of the reasons why this is key for growing relationship, staying open and receptive as well staying dependent on our faith and not letting the worldly wisdom trump our vision.

I will write some of the things that stood out to me:

A child is curious. Just take a look at child’s eyes. Those things are WIDE OPEN. Fresh wonder and joy in those pure eyes. They’re looking at everything for the first time. They are receptive and absorb what they intake through their eyes. They approach all things with absolute fascination and interest. One who stays curious is growing their relationship with God will be reminded in prayer and reading scripture to take those words as fresh. To really absorb those words and breath slowly through them as our heart speaks. Reading God’s word and being willing to to ask questions when there is something we don’t understand. Keeping that curious open posture so we can heal, learn, and grow further in our relationship with God. God doesn’t just want us to do this with him, but also in the way we steward our relationships with others. Are we remaining curious and open and genuinely investing into other humans around us. Stepping out of our shoes more. Making it about others.

This flows right into the next thing that a child does: a child embraces relationship. A child is open handed reaching quite literally to their mom and dad. ready to be present. ready to engage. eye contact. head up. fully investing into what is in front of them. How do we embrace relationship with God? He wants us to grow in our faith in many different ways. Asking him for help. Speaking on gratitude and the blessings right in front of us. serving and helping others. connecting in community and helping teach others about God. the list goes on. Children embrace relationship with no hesitation. How are you engaging with God’s creation and embracing relationships? texts. phone calls. making plans with friends. thinking of others and checking in on them. being present in public and genuinely investing into others lives. keeping the spot light on them. not making it about ourselves and letting insecurities pop in when someone starts speaking. being like a children. embrace relationship. putting effort toward our relationships even when someone doesn’t initiate by calling or texting first. being the lead the embracing relationship by not holding resentment. acknowledging and speaking our mind. knowing how to say sorry. God wants us to be honest and embrace relationship with him. He is open hearted and open handed and present with us at all times. practice our relationship with God just as we do with his people. Embrace him and embrace his creation. engage. interact. face to face. loving others.

Another awesome point our pastor brought up was that children have an instinct to trust. As we get older and we let the world kick in, we are hesitant to trust. maybe for good reason, but how strong are the guards up that we hold? How do we learn to trust God more and have that sense of dependency on him that is spoken about in the bible? The question is for each of us to answer. Are we listening to God? when we read the bible, say our prayers, and really ask God for advise, are we going to be open and receptive when we starts to open up doors in our life. when new people come along, new opportunities, and more chances for God to push us in a certain direction. Are we going to trust our prayers and communication with him enough to realize when those blessings arise? or are we going to put up a cold shoulder and not embrace the opportunities and stay isolated, quiet and distant? Trusting God is tough thing to do at times. But it’s necessary. How come you’ve heard the phrase: A relationship doesn’t exist without trust. Think about this in terms with God. You read the bible and are working on becoming a better man or woman. Working on seeing God more clearly and learning more about who he is. What happens when we read things that spark up internal conflict .Those feelings like “ehhhh, this seems do-able, but idk about ________.” Maybe those things pulling on you heart are the things that are hard to trust God with.

I heard this: praying big is praying for someone supernatural to occur. something out of your hands. Trusting God that much that you need help from him to make a supernatural miracle happen. this is fully trusting in God. Are we taking things into our own hands or our own agendas?

Trusting is one of those things that a child does out of instinct. We have to set aside the hurt, the pain and distrust that the world has shown us, and remember that God calls us to rewind. To come back to loving, trusting, and having a posture that a child has toward relationship with him and his people. We have to make that defined separation between worldly and heavenly. Before all of the politics, the lessons people a,b,c taught you, before the lesson you learned in a hurtful intimate relationship, and even before the lessons you learned with your own mom or dad.

What does scripture say? what does the world say? 2 different paths here.

Trusting in God like a child is knowing his world, leaning whole heartedly into prayer and bringing it all to the table in a vulnerable way. So we can know the father deeper. So he can bless opportunities in our life. So he can open doors that we didn’t know existed.

for me, vulnerable, open hearted, curious and clear communication with God looks something like this: “God i don’t have all the answers here. thank you for allowing me to stay in your word daily and reenforce what it means to be more like your son jesus christ. i will fall short along the journey. but please give me strength to bring those doubts, mistakes, and challenges to you. to acknowledge them. to stay open and in relationship with you so i can move forward better. being an ambassador to christ and spreading a good message. i trust that you’re working on my heart and helping me embrace relationship and treat others the way i want to be treated. I trust that you give me this renewed lens of joy each day so i can make small to larger impacts on your people. you’ve given the power to adapt and be consistent. You’ve been with me through the 19 different times ive moved homes. and you’ve also been my strength to keep my family relationships strong and my gym routine consistently on point so i can uphold self respect along the way. Please continue to allow me to step out of my own shoes and make the impacts on this world that you’ve uniquely paved a path for me to walk. Please bring strength and peace to the ones who can’t see you just yet. the ones working hard and trying to do the right thing when no one is watching. the ones feeling alone and struggling to hold it together while they’re exhausted and taking care of others. You are a loving God. despite what I’ve witnessed through earthly fathers. you teach me the defining difference of what a heavenly father is. You are unconditional and consistent. You empower me to be a warrior at heart. to handle things even when i don’t think i can. Thank you for the leading nature you fill me with so i can continue to grow as a man. all glory to you. Amen”

My Father’s Ceremony – Burial Of His Ashes Prayer: Closure for the family

God, thank you for putting Greg on this earth. He is a Father, Brother, Son, Nephew, friend to each of us today. I quite literally wouldn’t be alive without him. You promise that you love each and every one of your creations. All of your sons and daughters God, and even if it was hard in the last few years in the midst of the pain and suffering for my father to see you and your glory, im rest assured that you’re taking care of him and his sprit in eternity. beyond this physical world. I know right now here is sitting there with you, face at ease, free of stress, free of pain, free of addiction, free of hurt or anything of this physical world that had ahold of him, and im know he is there smiling as we’re dedicating this moment this morning to him. Please let us remember my Father for the good impact that he left on each of our lives. The moments he got to appreciate the simplest of things with me like making me laugh until i couldn’t breath or playing sports with me. my time was limited with my father and he left an everlasting impact. one to this day that people who knew my dad around the Cleveland area say that they feel and see some of my dad inside of me. When i hear those reminders, it reminds me of the man that i am supposed to be. Carrying a little bit of who my dad is with me each day. Keeping my heart open and lightening things up a bit when life gets a little too serious. Please let this be special reassurance to my family and friends here today that some of my dad still lives on. Please God continue to keep my Father’s spirit in our presence. Sometimes its going to hurt and we might get reminded of him and miss him. please in those moments, let us remember his amazing smile and the amount of joy and laughter he brought to our lives. Please continue to let Nana and papa, Kendra, AE and friends experience moments that take us back for second when they remind us of him. Those moments where we come across someone in our lives, or a situation that reminds us of Greg. Please continue to put those little reminders out there for us so we can shed a little 5 second smile in the midst of our days to remember him. That quick smile when you hear someone say something in a certain way, gesture or tone and it makes you in your mind go, “hmm, that reminded me of Greg.” Please God continue to speak to each and every one of us personally, and let us experience convictions in our own hearts that tell us how we can move forward continue to honor Greg and keep a bit of him alive today. Its never easy losing someone that is a part of our tribe, but we have a duty to take the good that that person left, and remember it and let it add to our strength that each of us carries forward. thank you God for keeping me closer to my family and not letting us push apart or isolate in times that are emotionally challenging. thank you for giving us Indiana and a place of peace this weekend to let some of this set in a bit. letting it set in around good people, who care and love for each other and won’t cause more pain to each other in the midst of healing. let this weekend be refreshing to each of us. patience. calm. renewing. so we can proceed to all leave Indiana and be better than when we first came here. Putting to rest something of our past, but not forgetting what it meant to each of us. Thank you God for each of these people around me that continue to do what’s right and serve as great role models for our tribe and the people around us. that sense of Good and doing what’s right was put into each of us here and please continue to let it stay strong in the forefront of how we treat others and go about each of our works and journeys. Rest well Father. Greg. you’re in a safer place and apart of you continues to live on with us. We won’t let you down. We will continue to make you proud. Thank you God. Amen

Acknowledging Humans. Keeping your head up when walking. A smile to a stranger is normal and healthy

I naturally love to observe social environments and the way people respond. None of this is possible if i was staring at the ground and walking with an avoidant posture as i proceed in a public place. Why do some humans have a tendency when they’re approaching someone to stare at the ground or stare at their cell phone; to avoid eye to eye contact with the incoming stranger that is walking in their direction? Is it a fear of rejection, fear of judgment, a sprinkle of social anxiety, lack of confidence, or a blend of psychological ques that influence one to pull away versus leaning in to social interaction? What if I told you, our goal to enter into a public situation was to learn. To observe. To save the cell phone for a private situation and dive into human engagement. What if every single time we stepped out of our home, it was an opportunity to learn or to acknowledge others and make their day just a percent better. This is actually how it was because technology and screens became familiar. It wasn’t “weird” to smile at someone, or to say hi to them. it was more familiar and can still be familiar. And its no coincidence that when you practice these things today, you will stand out and someone will not forget that interaction.

Its a common agreement that we need interaction as humans. Look at when the electricity went out here in our area for 3-7 days. No screens. No charged up cell phones. People got outside and actually say with each other because they didn’t want to sit in a dark home or apartment. It encouraged us to interact. We have a pull to belong. No matter who we are. We can only pull away for so long until the soul feels a sense of emptiness because we aren’t given back or share our experience with others. You can only go so long with no physical touch, no communication or acknowledgement. its not a void. its human nature to connect.

Lets come back to the title of this article. i have gained a very good sense of situational awareness by simply trying everything and putting it to experiment. I have waved enthusiastically hi to someone, to a more mellow hi, to a more in better combination. All sorts of tones of voices and distances from people. sometimes you get looked at like a weirdo. sometimes people light up and smile back. sometimes people engage very well. and sometimes they step away. its a mix of everything. just imagine if no one else said hi to each other anywhere. we just all got locked into our own worlds where we didn’t look at anyone, never acknowledged anyone, and we all just walked around hunched over staring at the ground when we walked around? Its not to say that we aren’t busy. but even when you’re waiting in line somewhere for 5-10 minutes, there are several situations where interaction doesn’t need to necessarily take time of of your day. im simply talking about engagement in the flow of how you’re already operating during that time of day. not needing to have a 10 minute conversation with everyone you come into contact with. But when you’re checking out at the self checkout at the grocery store, to maybe smile at the person next to you and say hi to the worker who stands over there alone with no acknowledgement and simply just observing the transactions taking place.

How much nicer would it be if you left public situations where people were respectful, say hi, and made you feel a sense of connection?

Again, its not like everyone needs to be our best friend and be invited in our houses. But the word “friendly” does mean something pretty significant when it has good intentions.

A friendly atmosphere.

Who knows who you’re going to meet next? Who knows the impact you may have on someone else. Who knows what sort of connection, or learning opportunity you are about to dive into.

but none of that occurs if you stare at the ground, eyes deep in the cell phone from the parking lot to the door, or when you walk past oncoming humans when you walk down the street and decide to act like you have a text message to check; so you stare at your phone just to avoid the human heading your direction.

Question: What posture do you carry in public when you leave the front doors of your home?

Question: How would you interact in public if your cell phone didn’t exist?

Hope this gets you thinking. Really a goal of lots of my posts are to bring about observations, and in turn can get you thinking and influence some sort of loop breaking action that can create new experiments in itself for your life. Maybe they will help you. maybe not. but a blend of perspective will no doubt help you.

its no doubt that interaction leaves you with a good feeling. it requires an intentional decision to engage with another human. we are meant to build, work, and interact. make it more familiar in your life and feel more fulfilled. help others a bit more. step out of your own bubble and make it about someone other than yourself. step into that soul category and make a sacrifice to make the world around you better.

Always continue to do the things you loved as a kid. Keeping the soul alive!

I was sitting at Lakewood Park over the weekend for a sunset. I was sitting with my sister and she pulled out a coloring book. We started to color. Next to me was a family with a young 3 year old daughter. She was in a playful mood and was doing cartwheels. She then proceeded to lay on the ground in a “mummy” position and roll down the hill. Something in me really made me smile. My inner kid inside of me was telling me, “you’ve gotta do this.” I could feel the pull. I looked over at her parents, and I said, “I’ve just gotta do this. something in my feels like my inner kid is alive.” I proceed to roll down the hill. Laughing. The younger kid also was amazed that she saw an adult repeat what she had done moments earlier.

The older we get, its natural instinct to work by wisdom and when we mature, its even easier to get “more serious” without even realizing its happening. More responsibilities. More days that are programmed with routine and a standard operating procedure. This natural can cut off our “child like” outlook on the world. When we were children, we were curious, we didn’t take things too serious, we laughed lots, smiled lots, and had this innocence and posture that looked at the world with amazement. we didn’t care what people thought about us. we didn’t pause before reacting. We were less harmed and experienced less trauma at that time.

As we go about our lives, we experience lots that makes us pause. Maybe its the frontal lobe of our brain that allows us to see big picture and also a combination of experiences. we’re more likely to pause and to think about potential outcomes.

While this is good, it can also be a bit damaging when we’re too much in our own heads and over analyzing situations. taking the fun out of a situation. Thinking “what if” or “will this person think im weird?” Or “what will someone say”. etc. its a natural protective measure internally to question and judge ourselves.

The point we need to check ourselves on is: how often are we doing this and what is it preventing me from experiencing?

Take the situation with me rolling down the hill. it was a tiny hill. low danger of course since a 3 year old could successful do it. were lots of people around? yes. Could they’ve been having side conversation about me after seeing a grown adult rolling down the hill? yes. But at the end of the day, i knew i enjoyed it, it didn’t harm anyone else around me, and that’s all that really matters. 3

Prior to the coloring, we were skateboarding around. Something i used to do as a kid. it was spontaneous. didn’t always have a set plan. However, it put me in a flow state when i was able to go out and do tricks, cruise around, and just stay present with the feeling of the board on my feet, the noise of the wheels cursing on the ground, the ramps that i was approaching and going up and down on.

Lots of the time, we can think about activities, sports, hobbies or whatever it is that we did when we were a kid, and these activities put us very much so into the present. time would FLY BY. we had such attention toward the moment. the smell. the taste. the visuals. the sounds. we don’t forget them.

We reenforce this present moment state by doing things like this. Things we just know we enjoy to do without having to prove that to anyone. Just something that makes you happy.

For me it was skateboarding as a kid. really it was a huge part of my life. sports, skateboarding, adventures and hikes, going into the water. All things that i still continue to do today. I don’t even need to think twice about it. i just know they make me happy. i feel free during these activities. low stress.

what are these activities for you?

There’s a reason that a long term friend from childhood will make you smile and feel more kid like when you’re around each other. The buddy who “you just laugh so hard with for no reason.” People or things you do that make you feel “more kid like.” this is a really good thing in my opinion.

It activates a different part of you. a part that is extremly positive. it reminds you to not sweat the small things in life. it helps you let go and flow in this state of joy.

Take yourself back to a time where innocence, curiosity, and that “first time look” at life mentality was present. We access it and keep that alive in us by continuing to embrace what we loved during those stages.

We need adventure. we need to stay curious in our own ways. we need to have drive and work at things. personal projects. in relationships and with hobbies. we need to go to new environments. we need to experiment with new foods. we need to take action and get off of these devices and try things a bit more. get our hands on things. feet on the ground.

If you don’t know where to start, or are thinking, “when i was a kid, it was really pretty rough.” there had to be something… and if you still aren’t sure, don’t worry. you’re in the best place possible, because RIGHT NOW is the time to explore. trying something new. give it a roll. it might spark a little anxiety. that is okay. its unfamiliar. but we don’t know unless we try. we can’t figure out what we love or what we want to do unless we commit to something for at least a short time frame.

conducting little experiments. trying something out for a few weeks. giving it enough attention to see if it sparks that curiosity and excitement within you. the feeling like you know you want to dive deeper and keep working toward learning more. if its not one thing, then proceed on to the next.

here are some great ideas from when i was a kid that continue to stay alive today:

skateboard, baseball, hiking, jumping off cliffs into the water, swimming, playing tennis, throwing the football, coloring, reading, planting flowers, going for a walk, seeing live music, going to water parks, bike riding.

the list goes on.

I loved these things when i was a kid and coincidentally they bring me lots of joy to this day when im turning 31 years old.

Hope this helps. stay curious. take action. keep things kid like. have fun.

Turning 31. Changes I’ve noticed from the 20’s to 30’s.

Adventure has always been built into me. Since I was a kid, I have always had a curious outlook on the world. I just knew there was more to see. More to experience. More people to understand. More fascinations to take interest in. That is something within me that has just never left.

It really hit home into my 30’s to what that curiosity has done from me over the past decade.

Curiosity forces you to grow and evolve.

There are LOTS of changes that happen from adolescence into the 20’s. We go from living under the roof of our parents to entering the world on our own. Going or not going through college. Having roommates. Transitioning to a career type role. Maybe switching jobs many different times. living in different environments and states. different intimate relationships. The list goes on.

Generally by 30, we have started to realize more about what’s important to us. we leave the influence of our caregivers at 18 , and we spend the next 12 years until 30 to figure it out. Somewhat on our own. Somewhat with the peers and closer individuals in our lives. influenced a bit by them. Influenced by the work place. Influenced a bit by our own internal motives. A combination of them all maybe.

Generally, I’ve witnessed this point between about 26-30 where people start to really focus. Dive into their values. Their loops and their patterns they live in. Really starting to highlight the pros and cons of the commitments and time spent in ______ or with _______.

lets circle back to practically what its done to my life.

Something that is very highlighted outside of all things in my 20’s is: BOUNDARIES.

we could write an encyclopedia on boundaries, but here are some things that stick:

my ability to put a time frame and limit in certain situations, knowing that i have other commitments to attend to… having a bigger picture understanding of what the near future looks like. My ability to know where I will and will not put myself. Knowing how long i should spend doing ______ and what my cut off time is. All experienced by being in situations where chaos occurred, or almost occurrence, or even witnessing the consequences of other’s decisions around us.

Some say this is due to the front lobe of the brain that fully develops in our late 20’s. we start seeing more past the present moment emotion, and making more mature decisions based off what is better for our future.

Not that i put these extreme limitations on myself with boundaries, but it is very important from a self respect standpoint to know what i will and will not allow.

It in turn is very empowering because it brings about a focus and a plan for what your future is laid out to be. MAN WITH A PLAN I’ve heard some people say. that’s the best way to put it.

When you start to understand boundaries and practice them, you are able to bring intention to these different areas on my life: faith, family, friends, personal hobbies, social commitments, adventure, exploration. We can look at theses areas and understand the type of intention and plans that we have for each. “projects” in each category is a good way i like to look at it. “what do we have in the works in _______ area of my life?”

The biggest category that hit home was the last few years. Boundaries with my intimate endeavors.

It literally until 30 for me to understand how important it is to be on the same page with that intimate partner. Your intimate partner is a direct reflection of your mental health, your decision making. that person is quite literally a partner in crime. your partner NEEDS TO BELIEVE IN WHO YOU ARE NOW, ACCEPT ALL THAT YOU ARE, AND ALSO SUPPORT THE MISSION YOU ARE ON IN LIFE. An elite level of respect and support for each other. You mold together and that can either be resistance, or that can be a natural Evenflo. we’re supposed to come together and make each others lives easier. but that requires mature communication, understanding, sacrifice, finding middle grounds, practicing patience and giving more grace to each other. because lets be real. we’ve all went though some stuff. none of us are perfect. But I’ve realized with boundaries that coming together with more individuals who have a posture of “hey, i don’t have all the answers and im here to continue learning, being intentional, supportive, and bringing out the best in each other.” its became lots easier to realize whom those individuals are in my life, and as well as understanding with dating, what is favorable for me or what is not meant to be.

patience. sticking to the plan. staying in the gym through my 20’s has reenforced delayed gratification. realizing that the tiny efforts of today (1 day out of 365 days) does matter. and that mindset really is coming together around 30. every day is day 1. we can show up today or not show up. focusing on the present and loving the process. reenforces patience. Knowing it will all come together the way it is supposed to when we trust the plan. being in the 30’s now reenforced the Return on investment for the little things that i did for the last 10 years straight… the daily meditation practice… the daily exercise… the daily outdoor exposure.. the daily communication with some of my loved ones.. the daily choices with food.. the daily future planning for what is to come with goals in all these different aspects… they do matter. trust the process. patience is reenforced and is coming to light lots at 30. if you weren’t a good planner at 18, I’m telling you at 30 that a calendar is going to make your lives easier and is very supportive of focus and intention with different areas of your life.

.Next: Sensibility and sensitivity both. I’ve realized as a disciplined man and thrives off consistency, that when little things happen, over the years it can be easy to let them go. let them build up. and next thing you know, you are overloaded with stress and were unaware to where that stress was building up from. lots of the time, that “creeping up on your stress” could be the conversations you didn’t have. the acknowledgments that you didn’t make. the “things left unsaid.” being clearer with speaking our mind. realizing if something rubbed you wrong, that it’s important to verbalize it and talk it out with said person. When we pay attention to the little details in our relationships, we operate lots more at peace. staying on the same page. therefore, we don’t see this “resentment” creep up that causes issues. I feel as though from 18-28, i didn’t have as much respect for my own emotions, and therefore, i wouldn’t take other’s emotions as serious. it might’ve been “easier” for me to let go of mine. to move forward. But the reality of the world is: things are going to happen that really stress you out or the opposite party. When getting closer to someone, its important that we always nurture and be a safe place for the opposite party to share their thoughts and feelings. Understanding what people need in those moments of distress, and trusting that what they tell you they need is the solution. letting time settle the emotion. This challenge coming from childhood as a man and to be “more of a man” is a weird place to navigate. yes, we are driven, need a sense of adventure, strong purpose, and want to push ourselves in our personal commitments. Sensibly this what men did since the beginning of time. But from a sensitive manner, all moments don’t require a push. some require presence and a good listening ear. the mind and the heart tend to have a bit of a push and pull relationship here. The best way i learned my lessons in this realm was to really make mistakes to be honest. to speak a little too much at times. to try to give solutions too quickly. To give to much presence when someone needed space. All situations that reenforce how powerful relationship growth can be when we understand the needs of the opposite party.

all of these concepts do fall in line with “being curious.” upholding a posture of “there is more for me to learn. there is always room for me to improve.” lots of this came from my faith and fitness foundations. whether it was starting to put things into words with prayer and talk outload about my struggles as well as my gratitude. Or staying in the gym despite what was going on around me in life. these 2 places were always really grounding for me. I really don’t see how it would be possible to move backward if you gave faith a try, or gave the gym routine a try. Both things that are going to help you become more self aware, and program your brain to look at different aspects of your life, and realize “there is room to grow, but there is also so many benefits along the way that are going to show up and offer you lots of blessings.” blessings of peace. love. health. and overall better fulfillment in all aspects of your life.

The best part about staying consistent with self-work through your 20’s is, its going to help you operate more in the middle ground when moments of chaos occur around you. you will notice as i have, that at 31 now, i feel “less affected” by this physical world a circumstance around me. know why? Because i have stayed consistent long enough though my 20’s to build a foundation. it doesn’t matter where i live or what environment i am in. I will generally continue to stay habitual in the things that ive deemed as part of my value set. You settle in the values and where you spend your time by staying curious, but also by committing. you can’t be a fly by night type of person sustainably long term. there are going to be some things that “stick.” and this is good. this sense of consistency with the right things are going to offer so many benefits for you, but also for helping others around you and feeling more connected to your community. the people you will meet. the lives you will change with the testimony you have to offer.

In the midst of it all, don’t forget to include some “wild card activities,” i like to call them. this is still that “ultra curious” part of me that leaves room to try something a little bit new. the simplest of things. traveling to new environments. trying new foods. giving a different type of exercise a try. a new location for hiking. a new cultural experience that gathers more information and experience that you will forever have with you.

so 20-30. stay curious. never stop being curious. however, we settle into more of what’s important to us by first staying curious. trying things and then being surprised with which ones stick. ones that are in line with our soul. all of a sudden, you notice your doing something for the next 5,10,20 years. it became apart of your identity. but we will never know unless we try. stay open minded. you don’t have all the answers. ask more questions. step out of your shoes and make it more about others. when people tell you things, dive deeper into their words. Really take serious how someone else is feeling or thinking about something. acknowledge things and don’t’ be afraid to bring things back in conversation. simple things or more difficult things. all of this will help you operate more in flow. lighter. a weight off the shoulder type feeling. all of the joy and return on investments will kick in. stick to the plan. your life is an experiment. put the experiment of choice to the test. stay consistent. develop data so you can the adjust. you have the testimony. you have the experience. you now know how to proceed.

Hope this helps.

My Cold Plunging Outside in Nature the Entire Winter Experiment: My Testimony/Next Steps

I did it. Originally said 16 weeks. Think i did 13 or 14 weeks straight of cold plunging all winter. They consisted of 3 minute submersion up to the neck. Local Ponds. Lakes. Rivers. Wherever it happened to be most convenient. How will i proceed? lets take a dive in:

Though the whole process, i was finishing my showers in the morning with 2 minutes of cold as well, as taking walks outside on lunch break in low amount of clothes to ensure i got more cold shock exposure.

I noticed there were a few periods where i actually got a bit drained from the high exposure to the cold stress. i would pull back a bit at times and found a nice sweet spot. There was a mental boost afterward that lingered for hours. I did feel a sense of strong accomplishment. I remember early on before the plunges and showers I would have this urge in me to want to skip it. i would slight dread it. But then i was also reminded of how powerful the benefits are and to overcome the challenge. Always worth it each time i did it.

Later in the journey, i didn’t notice that partial anxiety kick in about dreading the cold. I did notice over the course of the last few months, that my body fat reduced and my body tightened up from an appearance standpoint. The science does show that the metabolism is increased and we are burning energy more efficiently after morning cold exposure. That effect has shown itself very well.

I also noticed my cardiovascular health feeling pretty optimal. not getting winded as easily. feeling as though my endurance at the gym was up. I stay in pretty good shape year round, so it could or could not have been the cold. The science does also show cardiovascular improvements.

Now today, i would continue the plunges if i had a fancy one that i could keep at my apartment, but i will not be doing so. instead, i am doing morning 2 minute cold showers about 4-5 times a week. I’ll start the shower warm and then go pretty darn cold for the last 2 minutes. I don’t believe there is science showing that the plunge is optimal over the shower. i do feel in the shower that my system is getting pretty darn shocked since im slowly turning around and everything. hit with that cold recurringly. where as: with the plunge, after a certain point, you go completely numb. I’ve felt just as good doing the cold showers.

I will continue to keep the cold showers in the routine. I like to do them after i hit the exercise bike upon waking. Really gets the system going.

Do i recommend the cold? of course. experiment with it and see where your sweet spot is. feels positive and mentally boosting to conquer something hard. Adding wins to our day. we need that healthy dose of system stress to keep a strong resilient system. similar to the fashion of working out and stressing the system in the gym for a short hour. Which then yields results for days to come after our system.

I heard a statement along the lines of: our society is becoming too comfortable. quick services. less reasons to move. convenience with everything. its important now than ever to add these resilience building routines to our life so we can be more prepared for the sickness that tries to penetrate our systems.

overall, im a fan of the cold. find the sweet spot. every other day. couple days in a row with a break. see what works. i noticed i was doing too much after i tried it for days in a row, and felt a bit mentally cloudy a couple hours after one of the systems. That was a good sign that i was hammering the nervous system a bit much.

So i pulled back. find the balance. with any incorporation. when i have a house some day, will i get a nice fancy cold plunge for the porch. probably yes. but for now the shower seems to have amazing benefits.

Enjoy.

Overwhelmed Altered Mental States: Waking up Earlier, Fasting, and Meditation for Life Changing Results

Imagine this situation: Someone wakes up last minute possible and rushes to work. Maybe eats a granola bar on the way. Skips out on any water. Getting to work and being bombarded with 100 things to do. potentially even skipping lunch. Eating while working at the computer. gets off work. has to pick up the kids. gets home and orders take out. Finishes dinner and is exhausted. By the time dinner is done and the kids are settling, the food coma from the highly processed low quantity oils in the takeout start the hit. Now deeper exhaustion and fatigue sets in. By this time, it’s closer to 8PM and there is no energy left to engage with your significant other or kids, but to watch Netflix and repeat the whole day over again.

Above is an example of what it means to be in a altered state. Affected highly by not only the responsibilities and stresses of the day, but by the type of food being ingested. part of getting out of an altered state is getting ahead of our day. Having a game plan. This way, we aren’t waking up with sky high blood pressure, heart rate out of control, and next thing we know: its bedtime and our head is smacking the pillow. A huge first way to prevent this “fast forward on the remote” living is to wake up early enough. No doubt that waking up 1.5 hours before we “start our day” is a huge win. I’ve witnessed this in the most peaceful individuals and happy individuals. They aren’t waking up 20 minutes before they have to leave the house. its 1.5-2.5 hours. This way we are able to get the mind right, potentially exercise, pray , and prepare. Enjoying some time with ourselves, our family, and walk into the day with a sharp mind. The flip to this is programming ourselves to have extreme anxiety by waking up last second and rushing out of the door. Its just not an option in the high performance, mental and physical optimization world I live in. Many others would agree that they want to have full energy, low anxiety, and peaceful presence in this day. This is the one way to do it.

There has to be moments where you, or you and your spouse are sitting down and planning on how to get ahead of life. This way, we aren’t left in a constant state of execute, execute, execute, without gratefulness, peace and enjoyment involved. When is it her turn to have that time after work while you watch the kids? And visa versa. How can you both be up early enough to get your minds right before the day starts? What conversations are we having about food planned for dinner? What convos are we having about food for our children in the morning or lunch? What planned activities are we putting on the calendar that we can all enjoy together outside of work? What time are we planning to have date night and time away from the family? How are we keeping intention with the actions we take the time we spend. Ourselves. Ourselves and our spouse. Ourselves and our kids. Ourselves and our friends. Etc. Everything does not go as planned. One thing for certain is: structure in a household rubs off on everyone around you. using a calendar is a must. Your kids will notice it. Your spouse will notice it. it will contagiously help everyone. We eliminate anxiety by creating “many knowns” and things that we are all on the same page about. Things we can look forward to. Intention with our activities and time outside of school and work. Its necessary. You don’t need to store it all up in your head because you have it listed down, and you can trust in the ability for you to plan and be on the same page as your spouse and kids. there are apps where everyone’s phones can match up on a calendar. Coolest thing I’ve seen for families honestly. Staying ahead of life. reenforcing presence and quality living.

lets talk about food and where fasting and meditation come into play with mental health and overall success of our days. When we are fasted, our mind and body are unaffected by substance. If we first got the stimulation aspect in lock: No cell phone the first hour or 2 and starting the day with calm, quality and good routine; add the fasting on top of it, and we are totally in an unaltered state. Unaffected by society. Unaffected by the processes of food digestion and impacting our brain. Unaffected by excess stimulation of anything other than what is inner. This time where we are unaffected can be the best times for reenforcing self awareness. You may feel sharper mentally in the morning. You might be more creative. You may think about tough things as well as great things. When we are less affected by the outside world and outside food and consumption, we are then able to dig inner more. Which is very necessary.

“How do we develop self awareness to the point where we can step back often and realize what we are doing well at, how we can be better, and realize where we are falling short.” It takes that space and time in an unaltered state that i spoke of above. This can even be complimented with going and taking a walk. Now you are unaffected by food, you are unaffected by media and stimulus, and you are in nature. A place that has always been and always will be simple. You have once again reenforced presence, self awareness, calm, and focus.

Andrew Huberman the scientist on Huberman Lab says he fasts until about 11AM. Funny because i do the same exact thing and didn’t even know he was doing it. There are huge reasons behind it. You will notice the clarity, the focus, the clear energized feeling. You are in an unaffected state because you are note weighed down by food. Water and air. That is it. Have you ever tried a 24-72 hour fast? The results are awesome. I like the sweet spot at about 30 hours before i break it. Do this maybe once every few months or so. You will notice this light, peaceful, mentally clear feeling that starts to really come on. An opportunity for your body and mind to have a break from processing, digesting, and having to work as hard. Big benefits from that.

Maybe our systems get too overloaded to often? Another good reason why fasting can be that simple break that gives us time to slow things down. Internally and then what comes out externally.

Give the mind a break from the phone. Give the stomach a break from food. Give the sexual organs a break from being used. Give the eyes a break from screens and stimulation. give body a break from being over used.

There is a power in fasting from things in several senses as listed above. not just food.

Now imagine us in a unaltered state. We haven’t ate yet. we haven’t used our phones yet. We are outside sitting on a bench. Now lets add meditation in the mix.

Deep breath work. Programming your system to focus on nothing but the breathing. eventually getting into a state closer to 10-15 minutes where some thoughts start flowing. letting them arise. breathing through them. noticing where we feel them when they hit our stomach, our chest, or wherever they may be. Accepting them. letting go.

The little time of practicing breath work has such a high return on investment that will carry over into all areas of life. Such a powerful practice.

you now are unaffected by stimulation, food and by even your own thoughts. you have practiced being a pure observer, and you have now reenforced a more peaceful state of mind. this is mind training. this is training the skill of peace. this is training presence.

Always look at things as “I can improve this somehow.” Then the real life moments will arise where you patience is tested, and these are the moments where this type of “getting ahead of life practices” will come in handy. you will be able to handle them more maturely and calmly. With more ease. This is the power of growing in the practice of not being in an altered state. You are now far ahead of the day, and you will notice most of the time that things will start generally going in the direction that you expected them to go in. And when things go a different direction, you are able to handle them in a flexible, understanding way because you have practiced what it means to be far from the perspective from stress and overwhelming fast forward motion.

You can now be in more control to when that altered state can occur. You are now more aware to when altered states of frustration or like states are starting to arise. You are prepared to handle them. You know what space is required to process them.

I will finish this off by saying: after consistent 6+ years of meditation: this state of flow where I am on a cloud is active a majority of my day. it catches me by surprise with how light I feel. weight off the shoulder. almost as if I could fall over and just float away. its a natural high. senses are stronger and higher. breathing is more slow and focused. I find myself in the midst of chaos situations and still being able to hold composure. I remember I had some serious struggles in my journey where I’ve made mistakes the past 6 years. they are lesser and lesser as the years go on. more and more peace. more and more situations that I’ve been in where I’ve made a mistake, or not made a mistake and been able to be here today and be stronger from that perspective I went though. Seeing people and things clearly for what they really are. feeling things deeper than i ever have before. its quality. i want to feel pleasure and pain deeply. I want to understand them both and take them seriously. they’re apart of who we are. A higher quality experience of life. that is what fasting and meditation will do for you.

You will simply feel things in a way that you’ve never felt them before. observe it. appreciate it. its the way things are supposed to be. It brings you back to a child again. Always goes back to being a child. when wonder, curiosity and a new feeling would arise. That is what will start happening.

You are prepared.

you are trained.

everything is a skill. everything can be improved up.

Stay creating. Embracing and keeping the flow of creativity.

Looks at creativity as skill just like anything else that we do. Some of us are more creative than others, but it really is not a coincidence. Whether its coloring, painting, playing music, creating social media content, designing projects at home, reading books, writing blogs, journaling, creative writing, landscaping, etc. All of these activities and many more can be considered activities that stimulate our creative flow.

Think about it like this: The more time we set aside to activate that part of our brain, the “easier” it gets to be a more “creative” person. How do we become more creative? We train our creative skill. We quite literally case votes toward the identity of a more creative person by taking action in the realm of creativity.

It can be as simple as doing an adult coloring book. Drawling between the lines. Focusing on the present moment and really filling in each of those shapes. Attention to detail. You get to choose the color you draw with as well as the place you start on the picture. Play some instrumental music on a Bluetooth speaker alongside that, are you’re activating a pretty awesome creative flow. You are training your creative skill.

You will also notice that when this creative flow is activated more frequently, it tends to be stress relieving. It’s because if we’re in the analytical mind too long and too intensely, we’re going to burn ourselves out. Forget to smile. Taking things a bit too serious. Something can be important to you but that doesn’t mean that it requires you be so serious that you forget to smile the entire day.

These creative activities stimulate a different part of our brains. Simply put. you are then able to bring more innovative ideas to your work, to your relationships, to travel, to ideas and thinking processes related to changes in your life. You are also able to take this creative mind and help others when they ask for ideas or want to talk openly about anything they choose. You are able to step out of that analytical mind and really empathize.

We can’t solve people. This is another big topic here. People will always be unpredictable, and if you’ve realized by now: you can’t over analyze your way to better relationships. staying in this one track mind and focusing so hard on executing and putting my head down that im blind to others around me. when you stimulate the creative mind more frequently, you become more aware of what is happening around you. you’re able to step out of your shoes more and not internalize what is going on around you. you become a better observer and you don’t feel the need to defend or argue. You simply see the beauty and experience around you for simply what it is. Yet again, this is something that is easier done when practicing getting into that creative flow mindset.

meditation. reading. taking a walk and observing nature. going out to the water and enjoying some water sports. so many different ways that we can get creative.

We must be humans that create. and we must also be humans that execute and stay on track. its a flow. if we aren’t happy and aren’t smiling, then what’s the point, right?

I’ve heard people say, “Chas you make life look so easy.” But is it really easy? Or am i just routine into paying attention to so many different aspects that they all seem to come together in a natural flow. My routines and day to day are very intentional. To the point where its “easy” for me, but only because I’ve programmed my mind to operate with this current existence as my “normal.” To some, it might look overwhelming but for me: it’s a check in process. “What is appropriate” and what requires more time.

Self awareness. Drop the ego. Don’t be stubborn. Just be real with yourself.

“I searched the world, and it couldn’t fill me”. A healthy mind and body is nothing without a healthy spirit and connection to God and his scripture.

Why are there so many things we can’t explain but we can just feel it. We just know. The new toys, new job, new relationship, house editions, or whatever it may be initially brings upon some sort of emotional high. There is nothing wrong with it in its nature, but what about 1 month later? on a Wednesday afternoon. How do those things sit with you and make you feel? fast forward 2 years down the road. Its not that there is not specific purpose to them being in our life, but when its something that in its nature: only brought us joy when the emotional high was at its peak, then how much do we really need that in our lives?

Really helps me step back as i have furthered myself on this spiritual pursuit. Coming closer to God through prayer and reading scripture in the New King James version of The Bible. meditating on those words daily. Trying to be a better man. Praying about the little things im learning along the way. Learning what it means to live a righteous life and to be right with God with the decisions that I’m making in my life.

Bring that much attention to the spirit category has really helped me refocus and be intentional with “the things” that are apart of my life. Helps me not purchase fluff with my money. Has helped me put more attention toward connection with people and creating experiences. Things that actually can be shared and rememebered. We all face the greed temptations in our life pretty frequently. One way that I’ve been able to bring awareness to that is: asking myself what is the purpose behind wanting ____ or deciding to spend money on _________. Over and over again. It really doesn’t have to be stressful. it in turn brings a more quality experience with the use of our dollar. More focus toward quality foods, playing guitar, books, quality water, exercise, music, hiking attire, having dinner together, sitting and having coffee with someone and the list goes on. How we can use this dollar to improve our health and quality of life as well as help others and create momentum with others to empower them to do the same.

It always comes back to the meaning and purpose behind the decision or resource at hand. Makes me think: what about the decisions people make that lack intention? doing so because its easy or feels good. but there is far more than meets the eye to the decision at hand.

lets focus back in to the point of the article. Sorry, this is totally freestyled and unedited. Sometimes my writing will go where my thoughts take me. Thats okay though. This is the freedom writing that i wanted with this blogging. Nothing too fancy. just thoughts and real raw words on this doccumment.

i consider myself a person who lives with unconditional joy and love. I can honestly say that it stays with me. it isnt just something that comes Friday-Sunday. its something that sits with me Wednesday afternoon or Tuesday morning. its always there. I used to ask myself, “how can i be so happy and at peace right now?” then i switched the mindset on that: I realized dedicating myself to God, prayer, scripture, trying to be a better man, and really putting my heart in that place has helped me live with the continuous joy. God promises it in The Bible. I don’t have the exact words but there are several references to a life filled with unlimited joy when staying true to God as king and living life the way he outlined us to live it. so at this point, i can say: im not Suprise that i feel this unconditional love and joy. its the love God that he promises to all of us. Never alone. Best feeling ever. I read scripture. take the words seriously. pray to God. and I am committed for life.

That comes before everything. it can not go on the back burner. earlier in life, i noticed myself not disciplining myself to my relationship with God and i feel as though the temptation of alcohol, partying, and girls seemed to be a place i would go to more easily.

My mindset has shifted lots in the past couple years. i haven’t drank for a long time now. I feel very confident in who i am and feel as though the social aspect with me has evolved and leveled up. i don’t even think about a drink. i think about engaging and learning from others around me. asking about their lives. giving them my loving energy to help them be even better.

I’ve been dating socially for 2 years. Along the way, I’ve realized that staying true to who i am, and continuing to focus on God and pray for answers to whether or not this was the right situation for me; has helped me lots. it doesn’t cause periods of loneliness or highs and lows between meeting someone and then not speaking anymore. its aloud me to stay true to my values and connect with God and his word. That is always enough. what is right for my path will stay, and what is not meant for the path will peacefully move on.

belief in a higher power, prayer, and outlining what life should look like from a spiritual, quality standpoint has brought lots of fulfillment. Because when we dive into things of this physical world, and try to do it without God, it becomes less intentional, less quality, and could even steer us in a direction we probably shouldn’t be headed in.

This is what I’ve lived through as my testimony. We need to keep God in our plans and our thoughts. God is not a dollar bill. God is not a fancy Job. God is not some flashy loud thing. God is simply there and will always be there. Far past the emotional highs. he is consistent. Leaning in and trusting that, staying true to his plan of what we humans should live by in The Bible, and building a life with him has been the best ROI.

Spiritual ROI. HUGE. I focus lots of the mind and body category. I love to optimize routines for performance and feeling as good as possible for life. but that SOUL category is powerful and needs to be prioritized just as highly. All 3 categories very necessary.

“Must be nice.” – “Lucky you.” – “Enjoy it while it lasts” – “Wish I was your age again. When I was your age”……… Avoiding this energy and being an observer for more peace of mind

People have automatic responses. Impulsive. Instant. Things that come out without a clear concise reasoning. But these responses that come out of their mouths or through their nonverbal communication tell us a lot about that individual.

ENJOY IT WHILE IT LASTS

I was at the store the other day getting fitted for a tuxedo. One employee was flattering me. Making the experience enjoyable. Highlighting my measurements of my body and proceeding to tell me that I have an ideal figure. One shaped like a “Dorito.” strong chest and shoulders and small waist. We were laughing and having a good time. I was enjoying the experience and felt seen and it was overall very present.

Moments later: another employee around the corner heard us talking, and proceeded to say “enjoy the Dorito shape while it lasts.” She had a smirk on her face and sort of brushed off the comment. She proceeds to stare me down and wouldn’t stop staring at me. I became slightly uncomfortable. I responded with “my father and my grandfather at 87 still continue to have a Dorito shaped body. Pretty awesome huh I think we’re going to be okay.” She then had no response. She continued to fold clothes and had no look of happiness on her face. I proceeded with the employee that i was working with and there seemed to be a strange lingering energy. I saw that the lady that commented on our situation: she proceeded to talk with another couple moments later. She continued to speak about herself. So much that i really don’t feel this couple could get any words out of their mouths. I don’t even feel like they felt engaged or valued at that point. I witnessed this and thought “can this lady invest into the consumer’s experience? How does she not see herself making it all about herself right now? She felt the need to judge our situation. interject into it. and now she is proceeding with another couple by telling her life story to them.

We must distance ourself from individuals that are unaware of their insecurities or unprocessed emotions that they then put onto others. They can not get out of their own world. they do not know how to step out of the main character in the story roll. They proceed to engage in convo with defensiveness or the need to comment and judge others. I do understand that this individual is not able to step out of her own world and see from other people’s shoes based on her current mindset. It still brings up a good point: avoid feeding into this conversation. because you are now opening a door for the value set/mindset of her to be judged onto you. And it never feels good to get that sort of judgement. Instead: we can simply keep it open. not giving our opinion on any matters. Being curious. Asking questions. Not investing our own testimony or stuff into the convo which will then open up room for judgement. Be an observer if you have to be in an environment with this energy. you will leave feeling even more empowered if you refrain from engaging. Be respectful. Be kind. But do not share the sacred special details. These details are only meant for a small circle of people in our lives. It doesn’t mean we should shut people out. its realizing boundaries and what can and cant be shared with others. Valuable practice here. Its brought me lots of peace. When you’re around someone who is not a fan of you or can not relate to you, you must refrain from sharing YOUR STUFF. because YOUR STUFF will then be put on the table and POOPED ON. hahahaha. Our stuff is meant for people openly asking and being curious to what our stuff is about.

MUST BE NICE. LUCKY YOU. WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE

What does his response initially feel like when you hear it? Acknowledgement with a little snap to it? You have been heard, but there is a little bit of a internalized comment coming from the opposing party. Why would we say “must be nice” versus, “that’s awesome, or that’s pretty cool.” The tone of voice usually accompanied by these phrases have a low vibration energy to them as well. When i was your age. Meaning lots of the time: things i used to do to maintain or grow _________, but with no proper taking responsibility of things in the present which have that individual far from that value mindset than what he or she was in the past. Usually you hear this response in an envious manner. Im not saying all of the time. But i hear it lots with fitness. “when i was your age, i was in shape.” cant tell you how many times ive heard that. or “wait till you get to my age.”… now im not discrediting the beautiful process of our bodies minds deteriorating. We are meant to fall apart. Our physical existence is limited. However: Normally the individuals ive witnessed that say things like: luck you, when i was your age, or must be nice: vibrate low energy and are NOT DOING THE THINGS to maintain or achieve optimal results in whatever manner they’re describing this situation in. here is an example: someone very overweight tells me, “back when i was your age.” but they’re not exercising even 1 day per week at the moment. WELL NO DUH you won’t look like me. I exercise like 8 times per week. and you do not exercise even once… Now maybe its not physically possible for you to be at my level because of age.. but does that mean that we quit because its harder than it used to be?

Its the simply process of Maintenace. Maintenance with your car. with your house. with your relationships. They take intention. Planned out effort. scheduled time for ________. its all about where we place our time.

Back to the point of the article: once again when you come across these individuals, be careful what information you share with them. You most likely will not get a “biggest fan” response but one that has more judgement and envy put into the response. Again, that judgement can linger. its energy than sits with you and brings you down. there is no place for it.

Im not saying that we have to exile or avoid these individuals at all costs. this is a imperfect world. You will be around people like this. Its just awareness to what type of conversation you’re having with these ones. more surface level. Maybe letting them speak about their stuff, and when it comes to you: lay back and keep it a bit more brief.

Because why are we trying to gain approval from this individual? Are we trying to gain approval too often in general? Not everyone needs to be our friend. Not everyone needs to like us. not everyone needs to know things about us.

A power intention to focus on to bring more peace in your life.

Be a better observer. Because you know what? When you run into other individuals like yourself that a genuinely good people, they will invest into you. you will take notice and you will start investing into them. we have now created a harmonious quality social interaction. Let those unfold… only done so by investing into others first. being curious. wait until they really want to know more.